haayz.. i don't know how to start my blog today.. well. of course i miss blogging in mobbed.. i always visit it but sometimes, i dont really have enought time to make a post..

anyweiz.. my valentine's is cold.. me and edwin are in a complicated relationship.. he's not my boyfriend and i'm not even his girlfriend.. but we really love each other.. you don't have to have a title as girlfriend or boyfriend if you you know mentally what your feelings are.. right?..

but there's one problem.. he wants to let go of me.. not because they'll be going abroad or whatsoever reason.. but.. there was just a comparison between us when my friend (which is his neice) told everything about us in front of their relatives.. (edwin is not an old man okay? he's just 17 yrs old).. so.. that's where it started.. and then.. maybe.. he started realizing that he's not good for me because im so smart.. and everything.. i'm not telling that he ain't smart.. it's just that.. he's not serious to his studies.. get it?

for me.. it's not an excuse. right?.. he told me that he really loves me.. and he even cried over the phone.. haayz..

i want to believe him.. but why can't he fight his love for me? or prove to them that we're really meant for each other.? what's the problem with that?.. OH GOD.. please do so help me.. now.. i don't know if his hiding from me.. because i didn't receive even one text from him this day.. even a phone call.. oh.. i can't help it but to cry hard.. really really hard.. i just loved him soo much.. now.. im celebrating my valentine's with full of sorrow.. tears.. and pain..